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Watch Your Friends

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You need me, I need you is a life’s philosophy no one can dispute. Man was never created to be an Island: dependence and mutual existence has been a cord holding life and world together.

Nations with nations, continents with others, the need to tap and learn from each other has grown the world to a global village. Opening doors for people of other races to live in your domain means you value what they’ve got and are ready to share yours with them too.

A person who claims to be friends only with self will either be extremely poor or too frustrated to stay alive  —we need each other. People make you great; others make you feel great, even the high and mighty will not be so if there were no subordinates to stoke their ego. If there were no people to admire, jealous, celebrate and notice your progress, the motivation to achieve would be gone.

Now, with this level of desire and need for someone to call a friend, you need to be extremely careful to choose who to share your precious life with. Many relationships have been made and marred by the influence of friends. The fact that we cannot see the heart nor know the thoughts of others make even the very adventure of friendship a difficult one. Should you take people by their words? Should you trust your instinct of ‘face value’ when choosing friends? Does kindness have a role to play? Does giving and receiving gifts mean things are looking up for ties? Direct, open approach for friendship may look vulnerable but is it worth considering that genuine people can also come asking for our hands in friendship.

However, whenever or whatever method friendship commences, one has to be clear on certain issues.

1. Not all who come as friends are really friends: Don’t be deceived by how people present themselves as nice and friendly folks to be trusted and loved. It’s a deep shame to know that some only come close to you so they can know more about you and then use the information to deal with you. I’ve had a bitter experience before with colleagues who are the same race with me in a foreign land.

Naturally, meeting and working with someone who shares the same national with you gives a sigh of relief, or so I thought. The questions posted to me as we first met were mistaken to be genuine concern of getting to know a ‘sister’ at work place and I answered them but with a lot of reservations because I’m a private person and that consciousness sticks. Sooner than I could imagine, my matter was on the office floor and everyone knew where I was coming from career wise and every other thing I told her including what I never said or thought of saying- she lied about me heavily. Is there any point to say I was disappointed? I learnt a lesson I can’t share in this short article and today I’m wiser, more careful, much more discrete, and highly diplomatic in my expressions especially when your intentions are still on my scale. I never got back to fight her but handled it with maturity and the result was amazing.

2. Jealousy can bring some people closer to you: This is so dangerous. To start with, the motivation for friendship is wrong and it’s most times hidden; you on the receiving end might be totally unaware of the games played on you. With clear mind and conscience, you reveal your secrets and invite a devourer to dine with you, and what do you expect? You’ll soon be the prey.

They could either be jealous that you are where you are and desire to rub shoulders with you or they might want to gain access so your fall will be quick and sure. In an age where social networking is taking over sharing images, you should be careful who takes pictures with you and for what reasons. Desperate people post pictures of their dream relationships within seconds of having them. They are actually making statements with those posts and would keep the archives till most needed.

Now, making a fortune from sexual blackmail is on the rise. How would you ever know that an arm thrown around someone while taking pictures could be used against you in the court of law? Computer technique of mixing and matching pictures has even made the matter worse.  You can be made to appear in pictures at occasions you never attended.

3. Friendship out of pity could be deadly: Most times you get carried away when people come up with cock and bull stories of how they were maltreated and bullied by other people. Your instinct tells you “you can play a big sister/brother to this wounded soul”. Before long, you find yourself throwing in almost all you’ve got to make them happy and ‘heal’ quickly without knowing you are preparing yourself to be their next victim.

The truth therefore is that it’s not really others who hurt them but they who cause problems for all. There is nothing wrong with helping people in trouble but don’t be too quick to give them your heart and emotions. When Sofia took the decision to relocate a young single mother who had stories of woes that touched the heart, she thought it was a good decision but when the person she was helping turned against her, she never lived to tell the full stories —only close friends knew her regrets.

4. Question friendships that push too hard: I prefer friendships that grow gradually as we learn more about each other and gradually build trust to strengthen the course. People with ulterior motive can be patient when following up on their catch but most times they are too much in a hurry to achieve their goal. Fear that goes with evil makes them feel their prey might either escape, be delivered by knowledge or be taken over by others who are smarter than them so they gather every arsenal at their disposition to ensure quick success.

5. People are attracted to what you are or who you are: Friends in need they say are ‘friends indeed’. It’s difficult for people who come around you for selfish reasons to there for you at all times. If they cannot get what they thought you could offer, things begin to fall apart and friends finally turn foes. You become an object of ridicule, gossip, blackmail, insult and attack. It’s a lot easier for friends who hang out with you for who you are to appreciate and accommodate you more. Moving with you is a privilege not a benevolent attraction with manipulations and great demand.

…To be continued next week. 

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Posted in Nigeria News. A DisNaija.Com network.

Source: PM News

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Nigeria News

Kano Transfers Over 1,000 Almajiris To Different States Amidst COVID-19 Pandemic

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The Kano State Government on Saturday said it has transferred 1,098 ‘almajiris’ to different states of the country.

The commissioner for local government, Murtala Garo, disclosed this while presenting a report before the state’s task force on COVID-19 at the government house, Kano.

Almajiris are children who are supposed to be learning Islamic studies while living with their Islamic teachers. Majority of them, however, end up begging on the streets of Northern Nigeria. They constitute a large number of Nigeria’s over 10 million out-of-school children.

Mr Garo said the Kano government transported 419 almajiris to Katsina, 524 to Jigawa and 155 to Kaduna. He said all of them tested negative for coronavirus before leaving the Kano State.

Despite the coronavirus test done in Kano for the almajiris, the Jigawa government earlier said it would quarantine for two weeks all the almajiris that recently arrived from Kano.

Mr Garo said another 100 almajiris scheduled to be taken to Bauchi State also tested negative to COVID-19.

In a remark, Governor Abdullahi Ganduje said the COVID-19 situation in Kano was getting worse. He appealed for a collaborative effort to curtail the spread of the virus in the state.

Mr Ganduje, who commended residents for complying with the lockdown imposed in the state, said the decision was taken to halt the spread of the virus.

Kano State, as of Saturday night, has 77 coronavirus cases, according to the Nigeria Centre for Disease Control.

The decision to transfer the Kano almajiris is part of the agreement reached between Northern governors that almajiris in each state be transferred to their states of origin.

However, even before the latest agreement by the governors, the Kano government had been transferring almajiris to other states and neighbouring countries after it banned street begging in the state, most populous in Northern Nigeria.

Despite the transfers, however, no concrete step has been taken to ensure such children do not return to Kano streets as there is freedom of movement across Nigeria although interstate travel was recently banned to check the spread of the coronavirus.

 

Sourced From: Premium Times Nigeria

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Nigeria News

COVID-19: ‘Bakassi Boys’ Foil Attempt To Smuggle 24 Women Into Abia In Container

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By Ugochukwu Alaribe

Operatives of the Abia State Vigilante Service, AVS, popularly known as ‘Bakassi Boys’ have arrested 24 market women hidden in a container truck, at Ekwereazu Ngwa, the boundary community between Abia and Akwa Ibom states.

The market women, said to be  from Akwa Ibom State, were on their way to Aba, when they were arrested with the truck driver and two of his conductors for violating the lockdown order by the state government.

Driver of the truck, Moses Asuquo, claimed he was going to Aba to purchase stock fish, but decided to assist the market women, because they were stranded.

A vigilante source told Sunday Vanguard that the vehicle was impounded while the market women were sent back to Akwa Ibom State.

Commissioner for Home Land Security, Prince Dan Okoli, who confirmed the incident, said that  smuggling of people into the state poses great threat to the state government’s efforts to contain the spread of COVID- 19.

 

Sourced From: Vanguard News

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Nigeria News

Woman Kills Her Maid Over Salary Request

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Operatives of the State Criminal Investigation and Intelligence Department (SCIID), Yaba of the Lagos State police command have arrested one Mrs Nene Steve for allegedly killing her maid, Joy Adole

The maid was allegedly beaten to death by Nene for requesting for her salary at their residence located at 18, Ogundola Street, Bariga area in Lagos.

Narrating the incident, Philips Ejeh, an elder brother to the deceased said that he was sad when they informed him that his sister was beaten to death.

He explained that the deceased was an indigene of Benue State brought to Lagos through an agent and started working with her as a maid  in January 2020.

‘’She reported that her boss refused to pay her and anytime she asked for her salary she will start beating her.

She was making an attempt to leave the place but due to the total lockdown she remained there until Sunday when her boss said she caught her stealing noodles and this led to her serious beating and death,’’ Ejeh said.

He called on Lagos State Government and well- meaning people in the country to help them in getting justice for the victim.

The police spokesman, Bala Elkana, stated that the woman and her husband came to Bariga Police  Station to a report that their house girl had committed suicide.

Detectives were said to have visited the house and suspected foul play with the position of the rope and bruises all over the body which confirmed that the girl had been tortured to death and the boss decided to hang up the girl to make it look like suicide.

He said: “The police moved on with their investigation and found a lot of sign of violence on her body that she has been tortured before a rope was put on her neck.’’

He added that the police removed the corpse and deposited it in the mortuary for autopsy to further ascertain the cause of the death.

Elkana said the matter has been transferred from Bariga police station to Panti for further investigation while the couple have been arrested and will be charged to court.

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Boko Haram Attacks: Buhari Summons Urgent Meeting Of Service Chiefs

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President Buhari and the Service Chiefs in a meeting. (File photo)

Ostensibly alarmed by the latest killings of dozens of soldiers by Boko Haram insurgents, President Muhammadu Buhari has summoned an urgent meeting of Service Chiefs to find ways to stop the trend. 

He has also dispatched the Minister of Defence, Mansur Dan Ali, to the neighbouring Republic of Chad for an urgent meeting with President Idris Deby and his defence counterpart. 

Knowledgeable sources said in Abuja on Friday that the president is worried by on the deterioration of security situation on the Nigeria – Chad Border that has led to the recently increased Boko Haram terrorism in the area.

The sources which did not want to be named in Abuja said: “Nigeria has a Chad  problem in the Multi-National Joint Task Force (MNJTF) put together to secure the Lake Chad basin areas and repeal the Boko Haram terrorist attacks against all the countries neighbouring the Lake.”

The sources noted that Chad is believed to be having their own internal security challenges and this has reportedly led to their pulling away their own troops manning their own border around Lake Chad,  saying: “That lacuna is being exploited by the Boko Haram terrorists, who go in and out of Nigeria, Niger and Cameroon to launch terrorist acts.  This is a clear illustration of the fact that terrorism is beyond national borders.”

When contacted, the Senior Special Assistant to the President on Media and Publicity, Garba Shehu, confirmed that the Defence Minister is going to Chad but said he is unaware of the purpose. 

Meanwhile, the military authorities are said to be in the process of identifying the families of the latest victims with a view to making contact with them. 

Credible sources revealed that it is the reason the president is yet to make any pronouncement on the matter. 

“The President has called an urgent meeting with the Service Chiefs, as well as the fact that families of the latest victims of the Boko Haram are being identified and contacts made before a government pronouncement on the tragic attacks. This, it is understood, is the reason for the silence of the government over the incident,” the source said. 

 

Sourced From: Tribune

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